This is the story of John, my 19 years old autistic
son. John does not talk, does not read (as far as we know) and does not
write. Physically, he is healthy; a strapping 5 foot 10 inches tall,
and 200 lbs. Combined with the extreme pain threshold that comes with
his condition, he is sometimes difficult to handle. Head banging and
stomping are his two behavioral hotspots, my floors and walls will
attest to it. Until recently, we didn't bother to repair the damage;
John would damage the same spots over and over.There are many, many
stories to tell about John, some are funny, some are not. His
disorder has impacted the lives of our family, and extended family in
many ways, some cannot be measured.
For example, we are very non-social. Our house is a disaster zone,
mostly due to John. If there wasn't carpet you'd step right
into the crawl space in many spots. Our floors are lined with plywood
over the carpet. Just about every wall in my house has a hole punched
in it. Repairing it is like painting a bulls-eye for John to do it
again. Then there are the showers, sinks, and toilets that
he's broken. I had to replace the steps on my deck because they broke
off after John's years of stomping. Probably the most profound damage
is to the side of my vehicle. John has put 3 dents into the
passenger's side of my full-size Ford van, all with his
head. His child psychiatrist said that any normal person would
have passed out from the pain.
Those
types of episodes are rare though. Generally, he will stomp with one
foot, or hit the dining room table with his fist. By that time we are
trying to calm him down, but occasionally he erupts, heads to the other
end of the house to his room, hitting and head banging everything and
everyone in range. Because he cannot speak, it is usually impossible to
know what or why he is throwing a fit. His schooling is centered on
life skills, so he is able to sometimes show us what he wants or wants
to do. He can dress himself, bath himself, feed himself, and put
himself to bed. Mostly, he's still our little boy, a big toddler that
still tries to crawl in bed with mommy and daddy, and still likes to be
tucked in at night. He's still an innocent little boy at heart!
John attends public school, and will until age 21. Every morning and
afternoon John rides a special, public school bus. Until this year he
had always attended a special school, a self contained public school
for children with similar handicaps. This year, he moved to a public
high school that has a special education wing. It's worked out very
well so far, and it's along the way from my job, so I'm close by.
John
Crawford is the father of 19 year old John (IV) who is autistic
